[WinMac] And this guy builds computers?!

Dan Schwartz(expresso[at]snip.net)
Mon, 17 Aug 1998 01:30:45 -0400

        Hello, all!

        Time for a humor break...

        We've all seen "Tech Support Tales" and read about other tech support
"specialists" venting their spleens about the "dumb" support calls they
receive.

        Well, this little gem came from <http://www.techtales.com/>. This is
appropriate to the WinMac list because we all work with pee-cees as well as
Macs. This is also a cautionary tale because it goes to show that almost any
idiot with a screwdriver can build a computer... And not bother to document
what the hell he actually built...

        Here is the actual text from the TechTales web site... Keep in mind the
original author chose to remain anonymous... Probably if his boss read it,
he would be fired for laziness and/or stupidity!

 ---------------------

        Speaker up!
        ~~~~~~~~~~~

I work for a company that builds PC's... we got this call from a customer
who bought a PC from us recently... complaining his soundcard didn't work.
The call was passed on to me, because I built his PC.

Tec: Hello sir, I understand you're having problems with your soundcard.

Cust: Yes, it hasn't worked since I got it.

Tec: OK, is there a little speaker icon in the bottom right hand corner of
the taskbar? (I knew that the souncard worked when it went out... I'd built
it.)

Cust: Oh, yes there is.

Tec: OK, could you double-click it and check the volume levels?

Cust: They're all about half way up, apart from the one on the left which is
right up.

Tec: Ok sir.. (wondering if he'd actually asked it to play anything) Could
you open up media player? (Proceeds to tell the customer where media player
is, and tells him to open a midi up)

Tec: If you'd press the "play" button now sir...

Cust: "play" button? there isn't one.

Tec: (thinks for a second) The little arrow in the bottom left.

Cust: Oh, OK. There's no sound.

Tec: Right.. Could you check that your speakers are plugged into the right
jack in the back please?

Cust: Right (sounds of scuffling) Yes, it's plugged into the socket crearly
marked "speaker".

Tec: (now getting confused) Right... go into control panel, and go into
system.

(instructs him to look and see if anything is conflicting... no joy.. Then
instructs him to remove his soundcard, shut down his PC. Soundcard is then
found by windows and re-installed when it reboots.)

Tec: Any sound?

Cust: Nope.

Tec: Hmm... Could you play the media player again?

(customer opens it up, plays midi.)

Cust: Still no sound (sounding a little fed up)...

Tec: (sudden thought) Right sir, while it's playing, could you go behind
your PC and unplug your speakers, and plug them into any other sockets you
have that it looks like the speaker jack may fit into.

Cust: OK..

(customer puts handset down.. I proceed to hear scrabbling, and the sounds
of things being unplugged. This continues for a moment.. then suddenly
Beethoven's Fur Elise blasts out.. a startled whoa from customer.. frantic
clicking to shut the noise up)

Cust: It works now.

Tec: .... (having realised what was going on)

Cust: There were three plugs above where I had it plugged in, I tried them
and it worked!

Tec: Yes sir, you had your speakers plugged into your MODEM speaker outlet.
(holding head)

Cust: Oh.. sorry about that. (sounding sheepish)

Tec: OK sir... no problem, it's an easy mistake to make.

Cust: OK.. see you.

Tec: All right sir, take care. (puts phone down bursts into laughter)
Thanks to: Anonymous Tech Supporter

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        <mailto:expresso@snip.net>

                Webmaster for <http://www.faulknerstudios.com>

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This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b2 on Sun Aug 16 1998 - 22:41:55 PDT